Breaking down the future stars of blowing the game wide open.
Every year, fans obsess over rookie players.
Me?
I’m watching the *real* talent pipeline.
Here’s my top five picks from this year’s Ref Draft:
#1 – Kevin “The Long Whistle” Jenkins
Can hold a foul call for seven full seconds.
Great for killing momentum. Terrible for fast breaks.
#2 – Maria “No Look T” Gonzalez
Will call a tech without breaking eye contact with her phone.
#3 – Big Tony Wallace
Physically blocks the lane like it’s 1998.
Doesn’t run. Doesn’t need to.
#4 – Sam “The Stopwatch” Riley
Knows exactly how to reset a shot clock…
even when there’s no shot clock.
#5 – “Silent” Mark Hughes
No one’s heard him speak in 12 years.
Still somehow gets every call right.
Scouting report says:
Next season’s chaos is looking promising.
Whistle Diaries: Right. Every. Time. 
Leave a comment